Pineapple Vodka

I try to run a family-friendly ship around here. But sometimes you have to channel your inner-Chelsea Handler and let the vodka out of the closet.

I’m not much of a drinker — I go to the liquor store about as often as I go to the dentist, twice a year tops — but when a friend gifted us with some pineapple-infused vodka recently, I worried I might become very, very friendly with the Ketel One. Several bottles later (I gave some away, I promise), the The Vodka-Pineapple Infusion of 2013 was born.

Note: The great thing about The Vodka-Pineapple Infusion of 2013 is that you actually get TWO RECIPES FOR THE PRICE OF ONE! Holy Grey Goose — it’s Absolut-ly true! Heh, heh…

Step 1 – Pineapple-Infused Orange Vodka Cocktails
Get a great pineapple at the grocery store. (TIP: Around here, the pineapples sold at the warehouse stores — Sam’s/Cosco — are far superior to regular grocery store pineapples.) Core it, peel it, and cut it up any way you want and throw it in a large glass container with a lid.

Pour a bottle of the best orange vodka you can afford right over the top. We used Ketel One Oranj. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh….

Close the jar up tightly and let sit for 2 weeks. (Yes, you read that correctly. I’m so sorry.)

After two weeks, remove the pineapple and save for Step 2. Serve the pineapple-infused vodka straight up over ice. It will be the best tasting vodka you’ve ever ingested — sort of like the best pineapple kool-aid ever known to man — but remember it is vodka, so be careful. (If you’re a lightweight like me, dilute the vodka with some Blood Orange soda. Target sells it under the Archer Farms brand.)

Step 2: Vodka-Infused Pineapple Sundaes
Throw the vodka-soaked pineapple on the grill (and cover your eyebrows — it will flare up initially). Grill until tender. Serve with vanilla bean ice cream and a drizzle of caramel if desired.

OMG.